That day when I saw a young guy in the therapy home, that day when I saw him walking each step with so much effort, each step to him, consume as much energy as a normal person would have to carry a block of wood.
He was just my age, I assumed.
His condition was by far worse than mine.
And here I am complaining of my little problems out of the norm for what I have to face everyday.
my mother asked, ' are you having arthritis too?'
he said no, he was having a spinal tumor. A part of me tore to pieces, i wanted to tell him something, but i figured that I don't know this person and talking to a stranger was just way too out of my league. I figured that I will just let this pass, if he's still here the next time i went for my therapy, then i will consider talking to him, assuring him that everything will be all right, although i barely know him.
that was how selfish I was.
and he took that walk to the bathroom that day.
using what look like a supporting tool to bare his whole weight.
you could tell from his movement that he is in pain.
it is spinal tumor, so i expected it to hurt a lot, since it involves nerves and all complicated and twisted system in control of our body. each step lasted long, and there I was just ignoring the whole scenario when I can actually give him a word of comfort just to stay strong.
what went through my mind at that instance was, 'what if he dislike strangers like me to talk to him?' and what if 'it is a too sensitive issue to mention?' or 'what if it hurts him if I were to ask him?' all these questions went drifting in my head. So, there I sat watching him, with each step walking to the loo. I could tell you at that moment, I felt his pain, weird but true.
Soon, we left that place. My aim was gone. I did not even mention a word to him.
I sat in the car, thinking to myself, what a heartless person I am.
At times like this, all I can do is pray, to pray that he will be all right.
And so, i whispered a silent prayer to keep that guy strong and healthy as I sat quietly in the car on my way home.
and all I know if, if I was that guy, I will eventually need support from a friend.
Recently, i went to the therapy home again,
and he was not there anymore.
I want to wish him well.
The next time I meet someone in need, I promise not to repeat this same mistake again.
I will seize the opportunity to say something supportive.
everybody have to go through tough times which teach them to be stronger.
Hard times varies for each individuals.
Well, having somebody to talk to will just make the problem better.
so speak your heart out if you have the chance.
:)
and yes, we are struggling with Malaysian studies.
If it not for it, I can be running in and out of my dreams all day long. YAWN.
but with my girls, though the lectures are a tad bit dull, they seem to make things better. <3
and I am a lucky girl to have them by my side. ( the nia nia-s, revisha, mr.1.30pm,and the group leader)
I am suppose to write an essay now, but who knows, they haven't sorted out the work yet.
So here I am, writing a blog post for all of you. <3 hehs.
this is for one of the nia.
i know you will love it, others Don't jelly, I just happened to find this while surfing the net. :)
and I know she'll love it.
here you go, though I don't know how and where to get this for you,
I think a picture of it will do. :)
She love cats and shorts. This seems to be the perfect gift for her.
I would give you this if I can find one. :)
And for my baby, Don't you ever doubt that I am not thinking of you.
Cause you seem to be the only one ruling my mind. <3
I miss you.
And we need more pictures together. :D
many more to fill up many albums to let our many children to see in the near future. hehs.
I will sum it up here today.
till then,
vonne.
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